"All I remember about my wedding day in 1967 is that the Cubs lost a doubleheader." — George F. Will

Wednesday, December 15, 2021

2021 Regular Season Finale

What a fun regular season that was, HUHHHHHHH?? Congrats to Doza on securing the regular season payout and first place overall. We didn't know how it was going to pan out once Henry went down, but the rest of his team battled, along with early xmas presents from Jahns and Nordo in obtaining Stafford (QB4), Cordarrelle Patterson (RB8), and Diontae Johnson (WR9). 




Never in my ~decade of playing fantasy sports have I ever witnessed such gift giving, to the number 1 seed no less, to the manager who has Henry as his keeper no less, to the manager who drafted Austin Ekeler no less, to the manager who drafted Ja'Marr Chase no less. And what did he have to give up ? A couple shitty draft picks and ... Courtland Sutton? HUHHHHHHHHHH?





                           Let's take a look at what Sutton wound up doing rest of the year:




Currently on Waivers: 





This may come across as salty, and it should be. Im salty that none of my 1,300 trade offers didnt get accepted. If im Pete im salty these trades were made that ultimately kept him from winning the regular season. Im salty that Jahns's love for trading does not directly correlate to his ability to comprehend giving up a QB4 for a bag of chips still hasn't gotten thru to him, all while potentially costing him a defending championship title. 

Nordo, I wont even go there. SMH. I sure hope doza gave you a hand job or something.  


Here's the final records of the regular season




We had four teams finish at 7-7, this is the first year teams can finish at .500, due to playing 14 week regular season and did not disappoint. Playoff seeding wasn't anywhere close to being determined until the final week, which made it fun and interesting. How many teams will finish at 7-7 next year? Will 10 wins be enough to secure first place next year? Will we ever see an undefeated season? I think we might, especially with draft picks being thrown around we could see a team run away with the league.




We'll get into the playoff matchups and storylines later in the blog.. For now, let's dive into the last few weekly categories which still need to be handed out. Starting with where we left off..


Week 11


Top Scorer - The Flemchise - 226.7 points! 


Team with the single highest scoring starter - The Flemchise - Jonathan Taylor - 56.7 points! 





Most WR receptions (All WR, can include flex) - The Flemchise - 22 Receptions! 


That's what we call a clean sweep folks! Exclamation marks for Flem! 





Talk about a week to have literally every portion of your team go off. The categories don't always line up like that. It's nice to see a flush like this. 




Week 12

Top Scorer - Daked to the Tits - 150.85 points (Nordo had 150.25..... ouch!) 

A few things I'd like to point out regarding week 12...

  • Daked to the Tits got 21 points from his kicker, Daniel Carlson. Daked to the Tits also won the two kicking categories earlier in the year behind the leg of Grahm Gano.. leads me to believe that Nick has some type of foot fetish? Has he been hanging out with Rex Ryan too much? 








  • In all seriousness, I think this shows Nick's ability to stream off the waiver wire, which he had to do all season based on his draft picks. We hope to see him back in contention next year..That's the cost of doing business with draft picks, when you go all in, you're in a tougher spot the following year. This example should help keep the championship trophy in rotation for year's to come... I hope; Or, we may see people not understanding the draft capital value they should be obtaining for pro bowl players, cough nordo. 



From Wikipedia:
NORDO
In North American aviation, a NORDO aircraft is an aircraft flying without a radio. While sometimes used to denote small general aviation aircraft that are not equipped with a radio, the term is more commonly applied to aircraft that have experienced a radio failure while flying. Wikipedia

I think it's safe to assume nordo was driving home from work during the trade deadline without his radio working, because he sure as shit accepted some static offers. 






From Urban Dictionary:

When someone performs a sexual act in hopes of not going to prison. In most cases, homosexual acts.
Ah manhopefully I do this Nordo and I’ll be released.

Sounds like Doza pulled a nordo and performed some type of act to obtain Johnson & Patterson??







IYKYK



  • At the time of writing this (I still need to get to the next few categories, as I am doing these in order) I don't think Nordo has won a single category this year. This was his closest chance to receiving any cash back.... and by less than 1 full point no less! 


  • Jahns scored 56.55 points this week. (This is not a typo). I think this is the lowest score we've seen in the league since the MLB started tracking WAR in the early 2000's. Jonathan Taylor literally scored more points last week than his entire team did in week 12, and I do not believe he had any injuries. 





His Kicker, Randy Bullock, who is really fat, got him negative 1 points. Haha. 





Highest point total by tight end (must start) - Daked to the Tits - Rob Gronkowski - 18.7 points 






Longest TD throw by a QB (must start) - The Other Guys - Matthew Stafford 79 Yard TD Pass





Week 13 


Top Scorer - Kupp O' Joes - 170.3 points (Irwin, who had the second most points this week, lost to his own podcast Kupp O' Joes.. you hate to see it) 






Team with the highest scorer on their bench - Let Kyler Cook - Taysom Hill - 31.2 (thanks to a last second garbage time TD, which also put him over the 100 yard rushing mark for the game awarding him a points bonus.. crazy!) He would not have won without this late rush by Hill. 





Longest receiving TD - Kupp O' Joes - George Kittle - 48 Yard TD Reception 












Week 14

Top Scorer - Kupp O' Joes - 191.55 points 

Pete racking up the categories this year coupled with a 6 game win streak heading into the playoffs:



 


A refresher.. 

Scoring Settings and Weekly Categories


-10 team league, 8 teams make the playoffs; $100 entry:

Standard Scoring

10 team entry standard payout
regular season winner$200
1st place$500
2nd place$250
3rd place$50


Weekly Categories and Top Scorer


-2 Weekly Random Categories; $100 entry: See weekly categories @ end of blog.
-$75 paid out weekly, $25 per category (2 per week) along with $25 for highest score of the week.
-^total paid out for 13 week regular season =$975.00. High score in week 14 to complete $1000.00 

Trade Deadline Note 
-I am going to try and get a blog recap of the trade deadline and layout the picks people have so everyone is aware, since it all has to be done manually. Main thing to note is to ensure you have the draft picks next year that coincide with your potential keepers. We need to get the draft picks traded in writing so there's no confusion before next year's draft. 



2021 Playoff Picture 

Lets take a look at the playoff matchups and storylines for week 1... Keep in mind there are Thursday AND Saturday games this week. 

Double check your lineups, and as a friendly reminder the Doza rule is now in effect: Only those who are still in the money can pick up free agents (the third place game in 3 weeks can also make claims obviously since there is 3rd place payout). How far doza has come, so innocent back then to now taking all our money.. sigh 









The 2 point home field advantage is now in effect for the playoffs..Will we see it impact the outcome of a postseason matchup this year? I sure hope we do... stresses the importance of a long 3.5 month regular season and having to play a postseason game in Foxborough on a cold snowy December night... 






  1 Vs. 8 



-Paul and Doza faceoff for the third time this year. Paul put up very consistent numbers in both matchups in week 5 & 14. Credit to his team for still putting up numbers even after selling some players away for draft capital. There matchup in week 14 was pretty close, but David prevailed, which also won him the regular season. You know what they say, it's hard to beat a team three times.. Will we see an early round upset? 



-Vegas has the line currently at -29.6 with The Other Guys as the heavy favorite. If Josh Allen is hurt and can't play I dont see this matchup being competitive whatsoever. Here's to hoping Allen can play so Paul has a shot, and we won't have to watch Mitch Trubisky.. 




-I love Paul's play of Christian Kirk this week, with Deandre Hopkins recently named out for the rest of the regular season. Cardinals take on Detroit this week, and are needing to win out to secure first place in the NFC... look for Kirk as a value you play for Pauly Beef this week. 





-Ekeler has been limited at practice this week, and plays Thursday against the Chiefs.. If he doesn't play or has an off night things could get interesting.. 





-Will the trade for Cordarrelle prove dividends for David's Championship hopes? Time will tell.. I will say this. I HATE his matchup this week against a tough San Fran defense. 




Prediction: The Other Guys 134.6 to DraftStoshAllen.com 115.7




2 Vs. 7 




-Kupp O' Joes  was very consistent the first two times these teams met in scoring 140.75 and 142.2 points, respectively. For entertainment purposes, let's just say that's the magic number that Budweiser Clydesdales needs to hit to compete with him this week. Can he do it? The answer is no. The last time Budweiser put up over 140 points was in week 5 where he buried Mr. Kratzmeyer into an early submission tapout. I still think he owes me money from that rivalry week, but i'm not sure. 




-As mentioned, Peter is riding a 6 game win streak and has shown no signs of slowing down. The acquisition of Najee Harris at the deadline, and giving up that dead mule weight of Saquon Fartly has proven as the right move thus far. With that being said, the Titans just came off a beatdown of the Jags after a bye and I think they may pull out a win this week. Can Najee punch one in against a very solid titans run ground defense? 




-George Kittle has been on a tear these last few games, I believe I am countering Kittle with a Jimmy G spot start at QB against the falcons. 





-Leonard Fournette has been dominant this past month. I don't think anyone expected him to be having the season he is. 






-Cooper Kupp. There is nothing else to say. 




-Budweiser Clydesdales has some decision making to do with which RB's he is playing this week. It seems he overdrafted on RB's this year in the hopes of selling one at the deadline, which we know didnt happen (still salty), and is now forced to select 3 RB's to start and has consistently sat the wrong one for 7-8 matchups this year and I understand that this is a run on sentence but I need some help this week guys please someone tell me who to flex i'll pull a nordo on you 

When someone performs a sexual act in hopes of not going to prison. In most cases, homosexual acts.
Ah manhopefully I do this Nordo and I’ll be released.







Prediction: Kupp O' Joes 185.2 to Budweiser Clydesdales 139.9



3 Vs. 6



-These teams only met once during the regular season in week 8, where Arlington Park Bears won 146 to 100. The Arlington Park Bears has been one of my sneaky favorite teams this year to follow along, quietly doing their business and producing on a weekly basis to secure the 3 seed. OH, and I have a confession to make... I drafted Ryan Tannehill over Tom Brady this year, in which Joe picked up Brady with his next pick. I haven't been able to sleep since draft night. Brady's face haunts me in my dreams. 





For those keeping score at home, Brady has produced the most fantasy points this season with a whopping 432.3 points. Ryan Tannehill? 277.3 points.






I am a fucking clown and should be tarred and feathered at the logan square monument for all the townsfolk to see. I am not sure I will ever recover from this, but there's only one person to blame...









-Joe's ground game in Mixon and Elliot have proven to be reliable this season, as they finished at the RB3 and RB9, respectively. Unfortunately I do not like either matchup.. Elliot plays divisional game at the Giants, and Mixon plays at denver, an always tough place to play





-Vegas has this line at -5.3 points


-What can Jahnsy do to overcome those points? I think its clear that Chubb needs to have a day, which it sounds like he might with all the Browns out due to Covid this week. They could rely on a heavy ground attack behind Chubb, which I know will give this manager a Chubb. 




-Thursday Night Football will have the most impact on the outcome of this matchup, as Jahns has both Mahomes and Tyreek going, so be sure to keep an eye on that. Gotta think that they hook up for at least 1 long TD, feel like they are overdo. 





-The deciding factor of this matchup will of course come down to Monday Night Football with Justin Jefferson facing the Bears at Soldiers Field. This is one of those playoff matchups that I know will test a managers psyche, as he has his point getters playing on thursday, and has to wait all the way till SNF to watch Brady AND MNF to see the outcome of arguably the best young wideout in today's game in Jefferson (WR2 this year). 






Prediction: Jahnsy Stackedhouse 148.4 to Arlington Park Bears 144.3




4 vs. 5 



-Records wise this is our closest matchup on paper in the playoffs, both finishing at 7-7. However, The Flemchise finished with ~200 more points throughout the season and is looking to get revenge having lost both matchups this years AS WELL AS in the playoffs last year to Let Kyler Cook


-You know what they say, it's hard to beat a team three times in a row.. 





-I did a deep dive and did some considerable research (3 second google search) on this funky stat of just how hard it is to beat a team 3 times in a row.. here's what I've found:


"It is hard to beat a good team three times in a season, they say. Since the 1970 NFL Merger, there have been 21 instances where a team swept a team in the regular season and then had a third battle in the playoffs. The sweeping team has gone 14-7 in those games, which means it must not be *that* hard to beat a playoff team three times in a season. [1]

It is worth noting that in 4 of these 21 trio of games, the sweeping team was on the road in the postseason. [2] In the 17 instances where the postseason home team swept their playoff opponent during the regular season, the home teams went an impressive 12-5 in those games. The home team was, as you would expected, favored in all 17 games, with an average points spread of 5.8 points." Link





-Vegas has a 13.2 favorite for Flem to win, with a lot of questionable players for Kratz, this doesn't seem too far off. A steep line for a 4-5 matchup, but taking into account Flems +200 in the points for category this year it makes sense. 

-Should be a given on getting big boy points this week: Kyler. James Conner. Dalvin Cook. 



-Who is going to fill in the holes this week? No Odell, no Swift, possibly no Hockenson, possibly no Mitchell. He needs to play, against the falcons, for this team to have a chance. 



-Does Mike Evans have what it takes to produce WR1 numbers? Seems like that has been the question his whole fantasy career. No bigger stage than week 1 of the playoffs against a divisional opponent in Kevin James and the Saints





Will Tee Higgins continue his recent dominant performances? He needs to. 




-In my previous comment about Justin Jefferson, it would be cool for this matchup to come down to MNF to see Dalvin Cook vs. the Bears 




-Moving over to The Flemchise..Will Aaron Rodgers have to cut off his toe prior to his game in Baltimore? The Ravens have been playing good D, and word on the street is his pinky toe has a boo-boo. 





-This matchup is going to have a ton more answers to it 24 hours from now, as Flem has Kelce, Keenan Allen, and Chiefs D all playing on TNF.. gosh I would hate that. 







-This team is well rounded, I think the only decision making is who will be played in the flex spot this wee. decisions decisions... 


-This matchup is going to come down to one man, and one man only...




...coming off a bye, Saturday night, against New England. Does Jonathan Taylor have what it takes to take this team to the promised land? He's got 18 TD's on the year so far.. If he gets to 20 by Saturday's game end I think this matchup is as good as gone folks. 





Prediction: The Flemchise 173.8 to Let Kyler Cook 150.1 



                                          Good Luck.. and hope to see you guys for a Sunday Funday