ONE NATION, UNDER TODD

Did anyone else think Frazier running into the wall and breaking his face was a metaphor for Pat’s season so far? Just totally lost in the sun, it’s hot out; it’s in the middle of nowhere Texas, it’s literally what has construed to be the team we now know as ‘The Boowahs.’ Not to mention the distinct similarity frazier running into a wall has with PQ's peripherals.

Pat’s team is terrible, simple as that. You would think the guy that watches over 4,000 innings of baseball a year would know how to draft a fantasy team. It probably doesn’t help that he has only one minute to pick, God knows he needs more time than that on a standardized state test question. Listen, the draft is tough; it’s not for the weak of heart, or the slow indecisiveness mind. One minute you got pizza rolls in the oven, the next minute you’ve auto-drafted yourself into the 4^th round (I’m looking at you ‘The Kekambas Bitch’). To be honest, I am glad Pat drafted the worst team this year; it serves him right for screwing up the daily format and having your team locked in on Monday. Especially in instances when your star player gets suspended 1 game in the middle of the week for telling an umpire to go fuck himself.

This leads me into our next topic that will be a weekly award ran throughout the year: The ‘Papelbon of the Week’ Award. Otherwise known as: The ‘POW’ Award. 

At the start of each week (Monday), I will ask that each fantasy manager send in one player from their team to act as a candidate for the POW award. They will need to give a brief description/article/video/statement/action of the player acting out his best performance of Papelbon. 

Put it this way, if John Rocker was still in the Bigs he would hold the award for an entire season long. Thus, then would have people referring to him as the single longest living POW.

We will have an interactive poll to determine the winner of the previous week’s POW award. The winner retains the metaphorical belt until the next week and so on and so forth.  This will give us a great chance to see some spottier highlights and mischievous activity of the prior week from the players we love to hate the most. 

I would hope that this also helps people set their lineup being that these would have similar deadlines – Thanks Pat.